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Can We Actually Ban Small, Yappy Dogs?

By Chris Hall
October 3, 2014
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Being as I write for a dog blog and actually get paid for it, I hope it doesn’t make me a bad person that part of me wishes that this headline were actually real. More to the point, I hope that I don’t wind up unemployed. Or more unemployed than I already am. I love dogs, really, but the small, yappy ones sometimes make me want to use them for practice on a trebuchet.

When you make your trebuchet out of Lego bricks, it’s even better. [media-credit]By: Paul Albertella[/media-credit]

SASKATOON – While bans on pitbulls are increasingly common, Saskatoon has become the first city in the world to ban dogs under 5 pounds (2.27 kg) because they are “noisy, annoying and not really dogs.”

In a split-vote decision, City Council passed the by-law to shut the city gates to a long list of dogs that are commonly referred to as “Purse Dogs” because they fit in a handbag, or “Dinky Doo Doo Doggies” because their pooies are the size of Raisinettes.

— The Alpine, Saskatoon Bans “Shitty Little Yappy” Dogs

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Filed Under: Featured, Humor Tagged With: dogs, Humor, quickiies

Poe’s Law, As Applied to Breastfeeding

By Chris Hall
June 15, 2014
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Woman Breastfeeding Baby. Her breast is pixellated with a giant caption: Bottle Not Boobs

Bottles Not Boobs

It actually did take me a few minutes to figure out whether this was real or fake, which shows you just how solid Poe’s Law really is, when you apply it to real life. For the record, it is a parody, taken from the Facebook page of a group called Christians for Michele Bachmann. Naturally, that’s another factor against me: Bachmann herself has intentionally taken enough stands that were totally out there that it’s not entirely beyond the scope of reason that this might actually be from her, or a group supporting her.

However, Christians for Michele Bachmann is way too honest about the things that she’s actually said in real life. For instance:

Transcript
“Fred Phelps was hated for saying the truth about the militant homosexual. The militant homosexual is no friend of God, and no friend of America. I’m not saying I agreed with Fred’s methods, I’m just saying that I agreed with Fred.” –Michele Bachmann, Fox News, March 20, 2014
There are also quiet a few people, left and right, who have really weird obsessions about women who breast-feed in public. All that said, I’m relieved that it’s a parody, although I do kinda love the term “sinbags.”

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Filed Under: Featured, Humor, Politics Tagged With: Humor, Michele Bachmann, Politics

A More Realistic Version of Google Circles

By Chris Hall
July 16, 2011
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I’m gradually falling in love with Google Plus, at least until they figure out a way to fuck it up entirely or use it to control my brain somehow. Until then, the folks at HappyPlace.Com have been kind enough to provide a few suggestions for Circles that actually reflect the reality of my everyday life  The “Complete strangers I’d sleep with” circle is likely to become shamefully full.

More realistic Google Circles

 

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Filed Under: Humor Tagged With: Google Plus, Humor, Nerdy Goodness, social networks

When Do We Get CSI: Gallifrey?

By Chris Hall
February 1, 2011
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When you think about it, doing Doctor Who as a police procedural is pretty obvious, if not downright inevitable. While I steer away from the various Law and Order/CSI clones on television faster than a cloud of tachyons, I’d actually watch this. The only problem is that to make it work, they’d have to make the science much more implausible than it is now. I can believe in a time-traveling phone booth that’s bigger on the inside much more easily than the routines where the CSI team solves the murder by getting a computer tech to “enhance” the reflection in a photograph of an eyeball. Yes, the Doctor might stretch the laws of physics and reason a little bit, but at least he’ll respect you in the morning.

[Read more…]

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Filed Under: Humor, Pop Culture Tagged With: doctor who

Barbie’s Revenge

By Chris Hall
December 19, 2010
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No idea where this came from, or who made it, but I love it. Particularly the little doggie. (Originally found here, via StumbleUpon.) [Read more…]

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Filed Under: Humor Tagged With: barbie, Humor

XKCD’s Words of Wisdom on the Penis

By Chris Hall
November 24, 2010
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Gray's AnatomySince Randall Munroe is on an extended leave of absence from XKCD due to family illness (something I can relate to all too well), I’ve recently been inspired to dive deeper into his archives than I normally would. Here’s one of my favorites: if we could all take this one to heart, we’d be a much saner society and I’d be getting a much different kind of spam in my email every day.

Good luck with your family’s health, Randall.
[Read more…]

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Filed Under: Comics (and Comix), Humor, Sex and Gender

Christian Gene Isolated by Homosexual Scientists

By Chris Hall
March 31, 2008
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Christians are a pain in the ass. Truly. I love seeing the roles flipped in this short videocast below. It’s from the 2002-2003 Australian satire show “The Chaser Non-Stop News Network.” Kudos to the Pink Tiger Institute. I fully support their work.

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Filed Under: Humor, Queer Politics Tagged With: homophobia, homosexuality, Humor, satire

Spongebob is In Your Pants

By Chris Hall
February 24, 2008
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This has to be the most disturbing marketing strategy I’ve seen since the Harry Potter vibrating broom was released and then quickly taken off the market as the people in charge abruptly sobered up and realized what they were doing. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you…. the Spongebob Squarepants rectal thermometer.

Spongebob Squarepants Rectal Thermometer

I think that this conclusively proves that the marketing industry has done far more to create hordes of pansexual, sadomasochistic sex freaks than feminism, queer rights movements, or rock ‘n’ roll ever did.  Readers are encouraged to tell us what they’d do with such an item in the comments area.

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Filed Under: Humor Tagged With: spongebob squarepants, thermometers, toys, weirdness

Fifty Ways to Say You're an Atheist

By Chris Hall
January 23, 2008
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At ScienceBlogs, grrrlscientist has put up a great list of the Top Fifty Atheist T-Shirt and Bumper Sticker Aphorisms, and unlike most lists like this, it really lives up to its name. Some of my faves:

1. Abstinence Makes the Church Grow Fondlers.

4. Too Stupid to Understand Science? Try Religion.

5. There’s A REASON Why Atheists Don’t Fly Planes Into Buildings

16. Jesus is Coming? Don’t Swallow That.

22. When the Rapture Comes, We’ll Get Our Country Back!

27. “Intelligent Design” Helping Stupid People Feel Smart Since 1987

28. I Found God Between The Sheets

32. If God Wanted People to Believe in Him, Then Why Did He Invent Logic?

33. Praying Is Politically Correct Schizophrenia

38. If we were made in his image, when why aren’t humans invisible too?

—————-

Now playing: The Dresden Dolls – Dirty Business

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Filed Under: Atheism, Humor Tagged With: Atheism, Humor

More Evil?

By Chris Hall
January 17, 2008
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According to careful scientific analysis, this site is 28% evil.

 

This site is certified 28% Evil.

 

I want to emphasize how much I’m disappointed by this. I was aiming for at least 40 or 50. What do I have to do? Disembowel kittens on YouTube?

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Filed Under: Humor Tagged With: evil, geek stuff, Humor

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